Love Languages
what makes you feel loved in your relationship?
Do you know what makes you feel loved in a relationship? Many times, we may think we know what makes us feel loved yet when we ask for things out of our partner, our needs are still not being met.
This could be because what you think is your love language, may not actually be what makes you feel loved. Knowing your love language and your partner's love language is important in a relationship.
When you both know what makes the other person feel truly loved, then both of you can actively participate in those forms of love for one another. More times than not, the way one person is showing their love towards you is the exact way that they are wanting to be loved by you.
There are 5 main love languages: words of affirmation, acts of service, receiving gifts, quality time, and physical touch.
Knowing what your partner needs to feel loved by you and taking the initiative to actively provide that for them can strengthen and deepen the connection between the two of you. I like to have my couples that I work with take a short quiz to discover how each language of love ranks for them individually.
I ask them to take this quiz separately and to be completely honest with themselves while taking it.
Once they both have done this, I ask them to bring their results into our session so we can go over the results.
The reason I like to go over the results with the couples is because each love language can look different to every person. For example, the love language "quality time" can look very different for each partner.
So, if one person scores high in this area, then it is a good idea to define what quality time looks like for the person who scored high. This way there is no confusion and a mutual understanding moving forward.
If this is something you may be interested in, either individually or as a couple, then I recommend taking this quiz https://5lovelanguages.com/quizzes/love-language. The results may surprise you!
Written By: Crystin Nichols MA, MFTI
